Don't Insult Nirvana!
by Spagthesis
Summary: Luna becomes furious when Lily insults the band Nirvana. Rated T for brief violence and language. Cover art by Raganoxer.


**Author's note: This one's just a big inside joke between friends and I. Originally posted on my pastebin on 5/23/17.**

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The Loud kids gathered in the living room one day after school. They were giving all their attention to their baby sister, Lily. A few months have passed and she was finally talking more. Noticing that, they capitalized on it, attempting to teach her more words besides 'poo poo.'

Lily sat on the ground, smiling preciously while surrounded by her siblings. The pressure is high, though she plans on doing her best to speak for them.

To get things organized, they formed a line.

After some brief maneuvering, Lincoln lucked out and ended up being first.

The boy kicked things off right away, deciding to see if she could say his favorite superhero's name.

"Come on, Lily, say Ace Savvy, you can do it!" He said in an encouraging tone.

"A-ce S-aavy!" She stuttered.

"Good job, Lily, you did it!" Lincoln praised.

"My turn, twerp." Lori said, cutting his cheers off.

It only took her a moment to come up with the perfect word. The one she used daily.

"Lily, can you say literally?" Lori asked, smiling, and towering over her in anticipation. This one is gonna be a little more difficult than saying Ace Savvy. Can she pull it off?

"L-liter-al-ly."

Lori gasped. "You literally did it!"

From three syllables to four, she somehow improved by the second. It would only be a matter of time before she could speak a full sentence.

Leni was up next.

"Yay, my turn!" She squealed happily.

She moved closer to her baby sister and proposed her challenge. "Can you say... totes?"

"T-totes!" Lily shouted, exciting Leni and the others even further. That was pretty easy, though she still had quite a ways to go.

Three down and seven remained. Next up was Luna, she already knew what she had in mind for Lily to say. It's gonna be totally rockin'.

"Alright, little dudette, say Nirvana." Luna said, eyes half lidded and relaxed. She couldn't wait for her to nail this one. Seeing her current streak, the odds of that were very high.

"Poo poo?"

"What? No, Lily, Nirvana. Nir-va-na, sound it out, you can do it, baby sis!" The girl felt a bit set back that she failed the first time, but remained hopeful.

"Nir-va-na... poo poo." Lily blurted out.

"Ay, mate, just say Nirvana. Don't say poo poo, they're not poo poo!" Luna's fake british accent revealed itself as she became angry and defensive.

Her other siblings looked around, confused as the comfy atmosphere they had began to fade. Why is she getting so mad?

"Hey, can you hurry up? Luan's turn is next and we don't have all day." Lori mentioned, hoping to speed things up.

"I'll hurry up when Lily says the freaking word. Say Nirvana!" Luna yelled, clenching her fists in frustration.

She grew fearful at the intensity of her sister's voice, tears nearly welling up in her eyes as she started to sound it out. "N-ir-va-na is poo poo..."

And just like that, she said it. Not only did she say Nirvana, but also her very first sentence. Her siblings were stunned by that fact, except Luna. She felt like her heart exploded.

Seething, she leaned down to Lily's level and punched her right in the face as hard as she could.

The poor baby started crying her little eyes out at the sudden pain.

The other kids gasped, struck with shock, yet acted on the spot by grabbing Luna before she could do anymore damage.

Lori had no choice but to take charge of the situation at hand. "Hold her back!" She ordered.

"I'm trying!" Leni cried.

"No, Leni, don't hold Lily back!" Lori yelled.

"Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie..." The younger blonde apologized.

Realizing the mistake she made, she picked up the crying infant and consoled her.

Meanwhile, her brother and sisters prevented Luna from getting any closer. There's no telling what else she'd do if she got her hands on their baby sister.

Amidst the struggle, Lori became baffled, barely processing what's happening. This was beyond ridiculous. Sure the kids argued and scrapped at times, but to do so with Lily? That's crossing the line and then some.

"Let me go! She dissed Kurt and needs to pay!" Luna exclaimed as the gang hung onto her, gripping her threads tightly and doing their best to block her.

Fueled by adrenaline and rage, she struggled to break free, but to no avail. All of their strengths combined vastly outdid her own.

Being the most aggressive, Lynn and Lana used their might to forcibly push Luna upstairs and into her room.

They slammed the door shut and guarded it until ordered to do otherwise.

The furious girl tried her hardest to kick the door back open, yet her efforts fell short.

Currently, the other kids checked on their baby sister, who still kept bawling her eyes out.

They took turns trying to heal her boo boo by kissing it. It hardly made the pain go away, yet the affection became necessary after what just happened to her. They were definitely gonna have to inform their parents about this. Although, nobody knew how harsh of a punishment Luna would receive.

Once again, Lori had a move to make. "Alright, I'm literally calling Mom and telling her what happened."

Rita's phone rang while she got ready to leave work. It was her daughter calling and she had no idea why. It was an urgent matter that she definitely wasn't prepared for.

She answered it, only to hear the girl frantically speaking, going into detail about something Luna did.

"Wh-what?!" Her voice pierced through the phone upon hearing the news.

Lori and the others cringed at the sound, finding themselves growing increasingly nervous. They have never heard their mom scream like that before, it terrified them.

And despite how horrible the thing Luna did was, they still loved her. She is their sister. They hoped she would apologize and make things right with Lily. It needed to happen so they could get past this. To forgive and forget.

"I think I'll go prepare a coffin for Luna." Lucy said, breaking the silence and killing hopeful thoughts. She wasn't entirely wrong because in a little while the angsty teen would be figuratively dead anyways.

Enclosed in her room, the girl paced around and ranted to herself. "It's not my fault! She insulted Nirvana, she asked for it! They're the greatest grunge band in the world, nobody trashes them and gets away with it!"

Thinking about it more, she knew a cruel fate awaited her. She'd be grounded for life most likely, and the simple notion of it made her blood boil.

Infuriated and failing to think straight, Luna lost all control as she started smashing her music equipment in a tantrum.

"Aaaah!" She shrieked, lifting her amp above her head and throwing it against the wall.

She turned towards her guitar and smashed it repeatedly into the floor until the neck broke entirely.

Panting and sweating greatly, the rocker observed the damage she did rather carelessly. Having destroyed her one true passion like it was nothing.

Then suddenly, Luna's phone started ringing.

She pulled it out of her pocket and looked at it, noticing her mom was calling.

She answered, screaming blindly and unleashing whatever words came out. "Don't call my phone! Fuck!"

Only to hang up abruptly before Rita could even say anything, thus making things worse for herself.

Luna will receive quite a lecture and harsh punishment when her mom gets home.


End file.
